


No Happy Beginning

by mgsab123



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Angst and Feels, Assassins & Hitmen, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-10-03 17:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17287976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mgsab123/pseuds/mgsab123
Summary: "Tyki could never say if he liked his job or not. He didn’t particularly enjoy killing, but he didn’t hate it either. It was simply the family business to him--he was never given much choice in the matter. But still, he never really had any issues with it. With killing. With being an assassin."





	1. Chapter 1

Mission: Unknown Enemy  
Spain

Tyki (12 )  
Allen (10)

Tyki could never say if he liked his job or not. He didn’t particularly enjoy killing, but he didn’t hate it either. It was simply the family business to him--he was never given much choice in the matter. But still, he never really had any issues with it. With killing. With being an assassin.

It didn’t mean he didn’t find it annoying sometimes. Or, more accurately, that he didn’t find his family annoying most of the time.

"Tyyykiiii" came Rhode's whine through the headset, "Ty~Ki~"

Tyki closed his eyes as he tried to ignore his niece for the umpteenth time. It really was too hot to deal with his family, he cursed, as he wiped the sweat beading on his forehead against his dark long sleeved shirt. He opened his eyes to survey the area once more.

"Tyki! Come on, answer me!"

Really, he mused, attempting to not hear the whining in his ear, it should be illegal to have missions in places like Spain. In the summer. When he always had to cover any identifying marks or features.

It was down right cruelty.

"Tyki Mikk" Rhode whispered, not hiding the viciousness in her tone, "If you don't answer me right this minute I'll tell Sheryl you're being mean to me."

Tyki closed his eyes once more, praying to a god he didn’t even believe in for patience to deal with his aggregating family. It didn't help that they were all a bunch of savage wolves who always went straight for the jugular. (the family motto, after all, was always aim to kill) 

"If I get offed because you're distracting me, I'll come back and haunt you." he mumbled, knowing he had no choice but to relent to the little hellion.

He clearly heard her huff over the connection, "Don't be dramatic. I just wanted to say that an Exorcist should be coming your way soon. Unknown name, title or ability."

"Thanks," he drawled, "Because I definitely can't do my job without my baby niece's help. Isn't it your bed time in London?"

Tyki probably should have been more afraid when he only heard silence after his comment. Rhode had had many years of people who mistook her small size as youth. He knew the types of things she did when anyone mentioned it, but some part of him couldn't seem to care about his safety at the moment. He was good at his job, good at killing. So good that it all had become so boring.

(he was finding himself kicking every hornet's nest he came upon lately simply to shake things up)

"You'll regret this." came Rhode's hushed threat before he heard the distinct click of her line disconnecting.

Tyki couldn't help the shudder that ran down his spine. Okay, maybe he was still a little afraid of Rhode. (after all, Rhode didn't just sting) But, he rationalized, any mortal would be. His niece might look cute, but she was the nastiest of the bunch of them.

His thoughts were brought back to the mission as he heard the sound of shallow breathing coming closer. No steps to give them away and if Tyki had been anyone else he probably wouldn't have noticed anything. But he was Tyki Mikk. The Noah of Pleasure. (he wasn’t just anyone else)

He almost sighed as he flicked his knife into his hand. It was always no fun when his prey were this easy to kill. Tyki would die for something surprising.

He waited, crouched in the alleyway of a run down town. When he saw the telling cloak of navy and silver he snapped into motion, drawing his target into the alleyway. He slammed them against the wall, his knife already moving to slot neatly between ribs. But, for once, it never met its target.

A artfully placed foot on his chest sent him flying backwards. Tyki slammed into the opposite wall, not used anymore to getting the wind knocked out of him. He still recovered fast, though, slashing at his target once more. But his target was surprisingly quick as well, neatly dodging his strikes.

They danced back and forth in the narrow alley and Tyki couldn’t help but grin. As he ducked and dodged and dragged his blade shallowly across a covered chest, he realized that he was actually having fun. It was a shame he had to kill his opponent, he mused, they were truly very good. But Tyki was always better.

He saw the opening, readied his blade for the final strike, but was blocked once more with a desperate last attack from his target--the good old head-butt. He cursed as the momentum of it caused both of them to fall, ending with them rolling and clawing to get the advantage.

Tyki was breathing harshly when he finally managed to pin his target beneath him, his larger size giving him the advantage. He forgot about his knife entirely--lost somewhere during the scuffle-- and reached out his hand towards his prey's chest, irked enough to want to draw it out with his powers. His hand passed harmlessly into the Exorcists chest, wrapping around his heart. He couldn’t keep the familial maniac grin off his face as he felt the heart in his hand beat rapidly in fear.

His eyes moved from where his arm disappeared into a dark blue covered chest, up to a exposed pale throat outlined by delicate collarbones where his prey's jacket had shifted during the struggle. The Exorcist jacket really was too big on the small frame below him, Tyki mused with slight amusement, almost as if it belonged to someone else.

But any amusement he felt quickly faded when he realized that his opponent's hood had fallen back during their tumble. He noticed tangled white hair, a stark red mark before his golden eyes locked onto silver.

(this wasn't how this usually went)

"You're just a boy." he whispered, something sour and unknown churning in his stomach. 

The boy's silver eyes sharpened into a glare as he bared his teeth in a snarl, snapping with a distinctly British accent, "You're not much older yourself."

He startled, realizing that the boy was probably right. Tyki released the heart in his hand, pushing himself backwards until he rested against the opposite wall. The alley was narrow enough that his legs still touched the boy's.

God.

He ran a hand through his dark curls as he rested his head against the warm wall --damn summer in Spain-- before pulling one of his stolen cigarette's out of his pocket. He ignored the slight tremor to his hands as he lit the end. He also ignored the way his heart violently beat against his chest. He took a deep drag, welcoming the burning in his lungs. He didn't want to think right now.

(this fight was supposed to be with Exorcists, not children playing dress up)

"That's it?"

Tyki took another drag, head tilted towards the too bright sky with that brutal sun high in place, "You're still here?" he drawled.

He heard a scoff, heard the boy shuffle, before he felt the familiar weight of a knife against his throat. "Don't 'shit me," the boy all but growled.

Tyki dropped his chin, causing the knife to draw a shallow cut across the dark skin of his throat. He met silver eyes--which now seemed as though they were burning, burning, burning pools of liquid fire-- and lifted a brow with utter distain, a smirk firmly in place. He didn't utter a word as he slowly lifted his cigarette to his lips, inhaled and blew the smoke into the boy's self-righteous face.

The knife against his throat dug in a bit more, as the boy's eyes narrowed dangerously. And Tyki saw it, the darkness in those eyes. They were both beings of the shadows after all, it seemed. This boy might be young, but he was no innocent. He was born to be a predator just like Tyki.

And yet something within him just wouldn't let him kill the boy. It was surprising, really. Tyki had never known he had such a thing as a conscious or morals. But then again, he'd also never been faced with killing a child before now.

And if Tyki was weak in this moment, the boy couldn't hold onto his strength either. The knife dropped suddenly to the pavement, the only sound in the shadowed alleyway besides their breathing. Tyki couldn't say he was surprised when he felt a fist connect with his jaw, snapping his head to the side with the force of it, but, well, he kind of was. The hand not holding his cigarette came to gently prod his jaw, his eyes widening in his shock as he turned his head back to see what he'd see in those silver eyes. But the boy was gone.

Tyki closed his eyes, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Something warm settled in his gut, replacing the uneasiness from before.

"Till next time, boy." he whispered to the empty alleyway.

The boy really was the most fun he'd had in awhile.

(maybe he could be the distraction he needed to escape this monotony that seemed to permeate everything nowadays)

***

Mission Report  
Headquarters

Tyki (12 ) 

"Tyki Mikk"

Tyki bowed his head, holding his breathe in worry. He'd checked his appearance before coming, of course, but Rhode had bumped into him as he was entering the Earl's meeting chamber. She'd had it out for him since the comment in Spain (and then the one in Brazil a few days later had good and well put him on her shit list) so there was really no telling what she would do. He didn’t think she'd inadvertently kill him, but he also wouldn't put it past her.

So he waited before the Millennium Earl, the head of the Noah, wondering if this was the day he died.

"Tyki, love, its been so long since I've seen you. You're growing up so handsomely," his leader gushed and Tyki released the breathe he had been holding in relief. If the Earl was in a good mood, it meant everything was as it should be.

"Thank you, Earl." 

Tyki was proud of his own manners if he did say so himself. Sheryl would probably be shitting himself with joy. Poor crazy Sheryl had been trying to beat manners into him for years now but the street brat at his core wasn't that easily influenced. You can take a good for nothing off the street, but you can't take the street out of the good for nothing he'd always said. (or at least that's how he justified his own lazy, crude attitude and many bad habits)

But then, there wasn't much choice when it came to how the Earl wanted you to act. He said do, you did. Otherwise you ended up dead.(and death was a pretty good motivator to behave)(most of the time) 

So in front of the Earl, he was a complete gentleman.

"My lord," Tyki started, "May I ask why you called me here?"

The Earl chuckled and Tyki couldn't help his shiver in response. If they were all born predators, with the perchance to become monsters, then the Earl was nothing less then a true demon.

"Oh Tyki love I was just curious about your latest mission."

"Brazil?" Tyki asked, trying to keep the hope from his voice.

The Earl met his eyes and smiled. It was the kind of smile that seemed wider then ones face. And Tyki instantly knew that he wasn't going to like where this was going.

"Spain~" The Earl dragged out the word, almost making it seem playful.

Tyki swallowed past the lump that had formed in his throat, "What about Spain, My Lord?"

The Earl's easy demeanor seemed to sharpen, "About that new Exorcist. You encountered him correct?"

Some part of Tyki didn't want to tell the Earl about the boy, but every last cell in Tyki's body knew that he had no choice.

"I did," he started, trying to get past the ash taste in his mouth. Silver eyes flashed in his mind, "I didn't get much on him before he… before he got away. But I am unsure if he is an actual Order member or not," Tyki couldn't help the flinch at the lie and the words and the truth that had spilled from his lips like poison.

"And?" the Earl chirped, eyes piercing Tyki, "Anything else?"

Tyki hesitated but finally breathed out, "He had white hair and silver eyes. Exorcist jacket too big for him. I didn't get a chance to see his ability."

The Earl simply stared him down as if waiting for more. As if he knew that Tyki wasn't lying but that he was omitting enough of the truth that it was in danger of becoming one if you pushed on it too hard. He wasn't sure why, but he didn't want to, couldn't, tell the Earl about the scar. He might not know why, but he knew that nothing good could come of it. The more he thought of the boy, the more that blood red scar haunted him. (and those liquid fire silver eyes that burned burned burn--)

"And that's it?" the Earl whispered.

Tyki shivered once more before nodding, "And that's it."


	2. Chapter 2

Mission: Kill the Mafia  
Italy

Tyki (12 )  
Allen (10 )

Tyki whistled as he strolled down the street, twirling the pocket watch of the mafioso he had just killed. He knew that he was being brazen--the sigil on the gold watch was prominent and recognizable even to normal citizens--but he couldn't help but feel like egging on another fight. He was restless and antsy and he just needed some type of thrill (his hope was that being gunned at by the mafia as a whole would provide at least a bit of a distraction)

Something small and warm bumped into his side. He expected pain, a sharp knife to the gut to start off the fun, but was distracted by white hair and the flash of silver eyes. Was that--?

But he didn't have time to stop or pause or think as the sharp staccato of multiple gun shots filled the night. Tyki dodged the gunshots, a manic grin on his face, as he prepared to play. Hopefully, things would get interesting for a bit.

***

Mission: Smoke Out the Rat  
India

Tyki (12 1/2)  
Allen (10 1/2)

Tyki yawned as he lazily set the home of the rich merchant on fire. If this didn’t make the rat leave his hole, he didn't really care enough to stay around and find out what would. He motioned to the surrounding Akuma, letting them take over from here. 

He brushed some dirt off his pants and made his way away from the crackling flames, bored out of his mind. Lately, it had been boring mission after boring mission. He paused when he swore that he saw a flash of white hair in the panicked crowd. He tried to push and weave his way closer but, by the time he got to where he had seen the white head of hair disappear, there was no one there.

He shook his head slowly, chuckling at himself for fixating like this. He wasn't sure why he kept seeing (or thinking that he saw at least) the boy everywhere. He must be going stir crazy from all the boredom.

***

Mission: Kill a Cheater  
Egypt

Tyki (13)  
Allen (11)

Tyki officially hated sand. If he ever had to come to Egypt again, it'd be too soon.

At least the heat this time wasn't so thick and wet, he mused lazily as he strolled through the sand littered streets, but the damn sand was everywhere and it clung to him.

"Get back here you damn brat!"

Tyki heard the shout, processed it, but stored it away as useless. It had been a long time since anyone had called him a brat. (except maybe Sheryl, but Tyki made it a point to not pay attention to him so)

But he couldn't ignore when something small and warm crashed into his side.

His hands immediately reached out to steady the figure, "Take it easy now" he muttered, only half paying attention.

Then he got a good look at who ran into him and his breathe stuttered. The white hair and sharp silver eyes were telling enough. The blood red mark across his eye was like a brand.

"Boy!" he couldn't hide his surprise, his hands tightening around slim shoulders even as they felt like they'd been burned. Those silver eyes widened slightly, his mouth opening to say something in return, but he was cut off.

"You are dead, you cheater!" the same voice from before roared, setting the boy in his arms back into motion.

He threw Tyki one last look before turning and running through the streets away from the large man that Tyki now noticed was chasing and calling out obscenities at him. And he had no idea why, but he chased after the boy after only a moments hesitation.

They ran through the streets, on each others heels, with the shouts of the man behind them getting farther and farther away. Their breathes panted in the afternoon air as they collapsed against a wall once their pursuer was long gone.

Both their chests were heaving from the exertion but Tyki couldn't help the breathless laughter that escaped him. He still didn't know what had possessed him to chase after the boy (his lazy ass hadn't ran this much since his own time on the streets)

The boy looked over at him, an odd expression on his face, "What the hell are you doing here? Why'd you follow me? What do you want?" the boy spit out question after question, distrust evident in every word.

Tyki sighed, wishing Sheryl hadn't confiscated his last pack of cigarettes all because of a barbed remark towards Rhode. He felt jittery and off balance and could really use the relaxing presence of the missing nicotine. (or at least the burning in his lungs)He realized offhandedly that maybe Sheryl was right when he accused him of being addicted to the death sticks. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. (wasn't sure how he felt about needing anything) 

He ran his fingers through his curls to try and ground himself, "I have a job here. I don't know and your guess is as good as mine." he answered with another long sigh. This was not turning out to be a good day.

The boy's nose rumpled in thought, his eyes still wary but some of his distrust seemed to fade, "Okay."

Tyki smirked as he lazily angled his head towards the boy, a weight lifting from his chest at the boys easy acceptance, "Why were you getting chased anyway, eh boy?" 

The boy's expression darkened, before a harsh smirk split his own face into something more dangerous, "Some people don't like a good old honest game of poker."

Tyki snorted, "Honest right."

The boy huffed, some of the darkness leaving his features as fast as it had appeared. Once more he seemed younger, softer, "Okay, maybe I cheated a bit. But there was no way he could have known!" the boy exclaimed, hands wildly flying about, before he glared at the ground between them and mumbled, "He was just bitter I won."

Tyki couldn’t help but laugh once more. (Two times in one day really was a record for him)

The boy lifted his glare towards him, but there was no heat in his eyes. Tyki took a moment to appreciate the boy's delicate features; he really was quite pretty... And Tyki really really needed to stop right there with those kind of thoughts.

He turned away from the boy's glare, smirking, "Sure, Cheating Boy A"

Tyki could feel the boy bristle besides him, "I am a great poker player I'll have you know."

Tyki thought about the deck in his pocket, the weight heavier then usual. He wanted to play the boy, he realized. He wanted to spend time with this odd, marked boy. The words were on the tip of his tongue.

"You never answered why you’re here boy." he asked instead.

The boy seemed to withdraw, his expression shuttering into an empty mask, "I…" he paused as if trying to decide if he was about to say too much. He let out a small breathe, his expression closing off even more, "I'm here with my Master. We travel a lot."

And Tyki couldn't hear any lie in his words, just the emptiness. And Tyki was intrigued once more. And he wanted… he wanted.

So he stood and fruitlessly brushed some sand off his pants, "Well" he all but choked out with a forced smile, "I should be going. People to kill and all that."

The boy opened his mouth to reply, but Tyki was already gone.

Dangerous, he concluded as he walked among the shadows, trying to regain his composure. The kind of trouble that would get him killed in his line of work.

(he had already found out today that he had one addiction, adding on another seemed stupid even for him)

***

Mission: Kill the Thief  
Canada

Tyki (13 1/2)  
Allen (11 1/2)

Tyki didn't want to think about the man he'd just killed. Didn't want to think about how he'd begged and pleaded for his life. He was pathetic, nothing more then a doughy IT man that had embezzled a company owned by the wrong people. His tears and snot and sour stench left a nasty taste in his mouth even now.

Tyki's thoughts are disturbed as he felt his feet hit something and then suddenly he's falling. He cursed, the air knocked out of his lungs in one fell swoop as his body collided with something warm and solid. It wasn't until the warm and solid thing shifted that he realized that he had landed not on something, but someone. (as if this day needed any help getting worse)

He tried to remember how to breathe while he lifted his head to apologize. Sadly, his breathe and words whooshed out of him again as his golden eyes met burning silver.

"Oh," he started after a minute of staring, his lungs finally remembering how to breathe, "It's you."

"Yes it's me," the boy hissed, something murderous flashing in his eyes, "And you almost made me drop my food."

"Oh," Tyki muttered, his oxygen deprived brain slowly processing his surroundings as he realized that the boy was holding something up high and away from him, "Uh sorry?"

The boy glared at him again, lowing his arm slowly as if waiting for Tyki to do something to endanger his food again, "Whatever, you oaf," he finally grumbled as he took a large bite of something dark and doughy and sweet smelling. He shoved at Tyki's shoulder, "Now could you get off me? You're heavy."

Tyki finally lifted himself up, chuckling awkwardly as he realized that he had been basically draped over the boy's lap, "Sorry."

The boy shrugged, focused on eating again now that his food wasn't in immediate danger.

"So," he tried, not wanting to leave now that he'd run into the boy, but unsure what to say, "How has everything been?"

The boy shrugged, giving a non-committing hum.

Tyki nodded, "Right. Right." He bit his lip and tried again, "Nice weather?"

The boy rolled his eyes at him and Tyki contemplated phasing through the ground. They fell into silence as the boy continued eating, the only sound the crunching of the bag as the boy drew out another of whatever article of food he was engulfing.

Tyki decided to shut his mouth and just sit and watch the boy eat. He'd never seen someone put so much gusto into the act. (except maybe himself when he'd first been dirt covered and brought off the streets and put before the Earl with an endless buffet at his hands) His thoughts trailed off, wondering if the boy had known that kind of hunger before. He eyed his scrawny figure and almost sunken cheeks and wondered if he still knew that kind of hunger. But even he was not enough of an idiot to ask.

"Whatcha eating?" he finally settled on, a thrill shooting through him when the boy finally paused eating and stared at him.

Those silver eyes watched him, making Tyki feel fidgety in his skin, as he tilted his head, "It's a beavertail."

Tyki wrinkled his noise, "Beaver tail? Why would anyone want to eat a beaver tail?" he replied, wondering if he should be worried about the boy's apparent questionable taste. (though he guessed that he couldn't really judge considering his whole family was the definition of questionable taste)

The boy eyed him strangely before busting out into laughter. It sounded like the peal of bells and Tyki found himself unable to look away from the way that the laughter seemed to change the boy's whole face into something radiant. (he couldn't tell if it was like watching a car crash or the sun rising over the ocean)

"It's not a real beavertail," the boy chuckled finally, his voice slightly breathless from laughing, "It's a pastry dessert."

"Huh," Tyki finally managed, wrangling back at least a few of his brain cells.

The boy ripped off a flaky piece and offered it to Tyki, "Here, try some."

Tyki reached out and took the piece of the beavertail slowly, delicately, as if worried that something would break and ruin whatever had finally started to run smoothly between them despite him and his stupid mouth.

"Hmm, not bad."

The boy scoffed at him, "'Not bad' you, sir, have no taste."

Tyki can't help it: all the worry and awkwardness and warm feelings and restlessness beneath his skin burst out in a barking laugh. The boy glared at him some more before a small smile curled slowly from his lips until he was laughing as well.

Tyki smiled crookedly as he deftly reached over and ripped off another piece of the boy's beavertail and shoved it in his mouth, "Yup, still not bad."

The boy gave him a look of outrage, bumping his bony shoulder into him roughly, "Don't you go stealing my food!"

"What?" Tyki asked innocently as he reached out and stole another piece, "I would never steal your food!"

"Thief!" the boy cried, tucking his precious food against his chest, "You bloody thief!"

Tyki chuckled trying to reach for another piece as the boy started swatting at him to keep him away.

"Thief," he continued to huff out in-between bubbling laughs, "Dirty, dirty thief!"

Tyki finally gave up and settled back against the cool pavement, "Well at least I'm not a dirty cheat, eh Cheating Boy A?"

The boy glared at him as he ate the rest of his beavertail in two large bites, "You just think you're so funny," he muttered darkly.

Tyki was about to reply that yes, he did think of himself as quite funny but he was interrupted by a bellowing voice.

"Boy! It's time to go! Hurry unless you want to be left behind."

The boy jumped, grabbing all his things quickly, with the practiced ease of one used to being on the go, and scurrying away towards wherever and whoever was calling him. 

Tyki watched the boy's retreating back, wanting the boy to turn around and come back. Or at least to laugh once more for him. But he wasn't so lucky and the boy disappeared from sight.

(he wondered why his chest hurt so much)

***

Mission: Kill the Fool   
Ireland

Tyki (14)  
Allen (12)

Tyki slammed into the brick wall, his already abused back smarting at the contact. He readied himself, wondering if maybe the foolish Exorcist he had killed earlier had had a friend nearby. (it wouldn't be the first time that Rhode had kept a detail like that from him) But just as he was about to strike whatever had collided into him, he noticed the familiar white hair.

"Boy," he started, trying to shove down deep and leave for dead the blossoming warmth in his chest, "You just can't keep away from me, huh?"

The boy shushed him, clamping a cold hand over his mouth as he peered around the corner. (he was pretty proud of himself for the kick he gave that creeping warmth back into the dark corners of his mind)

"Okay, we're good." he muttered finally, removing his hand.

"Good from what?" he couldn't help but ask which only earned him a glare from the boy. Tyki sighed, it truly was sad that burning silver glares were all that he got when all he wanted was one of those elusive laughs. (but still, he supposed, beggars can't be choosers)

The boy huffed, sliding down the wall. Tyki hesitantly joined him, deciding to just keep his stupid mouth shut and not shove his foot in it this time. (he was learning, after all, and he hadn't forgotten the fiasco that was his mouth last time)

"So," the boy finally whispered out, his voice hesitant and a bit shyer then he'd heard it before, "How’s, uh, everything been?"

Tyki gave him a crooked grin, enjoying the way that the boy's cheeks heated as he remembered their last meeting and his own horrible attempts at conversation with the very same line, "Not bad, and you?" he started, whispering cheekily behind his hand, "And that is how you have a proper conversation."

The boy scoffed at him, turning his head away and giving him the finger, "Just trying to tell you casually that you're bleeding asshole."

"Bleeding?" he looked down at himself and saw nothing, "Where?"

The boy sighed, "Your back genius. You got some on the wall even."

"Huh," he looked up and, sure enough, he could make out a dark stain of blood on the wall, "Would you look at that," he nudged the boy, "On a more important note, you never answered my question from before."

"You're bleeding and you want to know how I've been," the boy deadpanned, giving him a look that hid nothing of how stupid he thought that was.

Tyki shrugged, giving the boy another cheeky grin, "What can I say, you're just so fascinating." 

(really, he deserved points for telling his pathetic truth and making it sound like a joke)

The boy blustered at that, turning red as he scowled some more, "You… you… you… idiot!" he stuttered on a yell, "You're bleeding through your goddamn shirt you halfwit! Dunce! Dullard!"

"I'll get it looked at later," Tyki shot back, his brow furrowing as he felt his pride tweaked, "I'm not that stupid."

"You could bleed out by later!" he cried out in anger as he threw his hands up in exasperation, "That's it. Shirt. Off. Now."

The words took a few minutes to sink in, leaving Tyki feeling dizzy, before he drew back as if struck, "What?" he squeaked, "No. Never. No way. No."

The boy hissed, actually hissed, before he pounced on Tyki wrestling his shirt off with surprising strength.

"Leave my shirt alone!"

"It comes off."

"What are you even doing?" Tyki grunted as he got kneed in the gut a few times.

"Helping the unbearably stupid."

"I'm too old for this!" he moaned as he finally gave in and stopped fighting, leaving the boy to do as he wanted. (god only knew that there was no stopping the little devil)

"Yes!" the boy cried out in triumph, finally managing to get his shirt off.

"Beast," he muttered as he rubbed his stomach and winced at the sting of the claw marks the boy had left.

"It's for your own good," the boy sniffed, "Now turn around and let me see your back."

Tyki sighed, already drained of any fight he once had. (he didn't think he would ever be strong enough to refuse the boy)(and that thought scared him more then he'd like to admit)

The boy was silent as he took in his back, before he finally let out a sharp exhale, "That's… kind of bad."

Tyki held back a flinch as a hesitant hand touched his back, realizing now for himself that he had probably done a decent amount of damage.

"Does it hurt?" the boy whispered, sounding small and uncertain compared to his earlier confidence and force.

Tyki turned and gave him a small smile, "It's fine."

The boy scowled again and smacked him lightly, "Don't start that again. I'm going to go get some supplies to bandage that."

He stood, a determined gleam in his silver eyes, "And don't you dare move."

"Am I allowed to put my shirt back on at least oh merciful overlord?" he quipped.

"No." the boy bit out sharply. 

And like a whirlwind, he was gone. Tyki couldn't fight the dopey grin that overtook his face. He chuckled to himself, not sure if he was happy at being cared for, annoyed at being bossed around or amused by the fact that he was getting tossed around and put in his place by someone who couldn’t even be sixty pounds wet.

"What are you doing?" came the sudden question through the ear piece with a cackle.

Tyki started, his head hitting the wall behind him at the motion. He cursed as he rubbed at his sore head.

"Tyki?" Rhode weaseled, he could tell that she was enjoying this, "All I heard was something about you taking your shirt off. What is going on?"

Tyki flushed, wondering how much of his conversation with the boy she had heard . He pondered simply not answering, but he knew that would only make it worse (deny Rhode something, and she became like a dog with a bone) Tyki choked on his words, trying to find the ones that would help him out of this with a bit of his dignity in tact. 

"Nothing. I'm--nothing. Just, uh, was talking to myself," he finally stuttered out, hitting himself in the head with how stupid he sounded. He made a pact then and there to never open his mouth again, ever, because apparently he was incapable of speech. (oh how Sheryl would cry)

Rhode cackled again, "Okay, suuuure. You talk to yourself often about taking off your shirt?"

He was about to reply that at least he didn't sound like a witch, but then he saw the boy running back towards him with that damn satisfied smile as he waved some bandages above his head proudly.

"I've got to go," he replied instead, that silly grin from before fighting to make an appearance. He heard Rhode start to complain, but he just couldn't care right now. He pulled his ear piece out, turned it off and tucked in in his pocket for the first time ever on a mission. (it felt oddly freeing)

"Turn around again," the boy bossed as soon as he was close, sitting himself once more on the ground.

Tyki chuckled and sighed, turning his back on the boy once more with a small smile. He shoved down that dangerous warmth once more back into the dark depths of his mind, putting it under lock and key.

The boy was diligent in his work, obviously used to patching up wounds. He wanted to ask where he'd learned to take care of bruises and cuts and mutilated skin. Wanted to ask if it was from personal experience or not. But he didn't because it was taking all his mental power to keep that damn warmth at bay.

Tyki's eyes closed against his will as the boy's warm hands ghosted over his back, his touch achingly gentle. (he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt such a comforting touch) (or any touch at all, for that matter, that wasn't meant to at least bruise)

The warmth he had so carefully locked away was practically banging at the cage bars to get out, to be released to burn him from the inside out. He resolutely ignored it. (tried to ignore what he didn’t want to think of as happiness)

He has to remind himself to simply stay in the moment, to take what was given and nothing more.

(screw warmth, screw happiness)(they'll fickle and they'll leave anyway)

 

(he debated the perks of a bolted closed iron box since the damn cage was proving to be faulty)

***

Mission: Kill to Disrupt the Quiet  
Germany

Tyki (15)  
Allen (13)

Tyki hit the ground hard, the air bursting out of his lungs on a sharp exhale as something heavy landed on top of him. Before he could breathe properly, he was already rolling and attempting to pin his opponent. His attacker fought back hard, all limbs and claws and wild punches. 

A flash of red paused Tyki's movements, allowing the fist that had been aiming for his gut to connect. Once more Tyki felt the distinct whoosh of breathe being forcibly ejected from his lungs. He curled into himself over the body below him, flashing a pained smile at the familiar white haired boy.

"We really need to stop meeting like this, boy," he wheezed.

The boy's struggles ceased as he finally looked at Tyki, "Oh, it's you," his eyes roamed Tyki's battered form quickly, "Sorry about that."

Tyki waved off the apology, rolling off the boy to lay next to him. He'd honestly been caught off guard. He hadn't expected anyone to be around this quiet little town nestled somewhere in Germany, much less for anyone to disturb him at the lake while he relaxed after fishing. All he'd wanted was a moments rest after his mission before going back to his family. 

Tyki glanced over at the boy next to him, noticing idly the day old bruises and tired eyes. The boy's chest was heaving, and there was definitely a tension in his muscles, but he hadn't made any move to leave. Tyki couldn't help but smile slightly at the maybe Exorcist (or Exorcist to be?) when the boy turned slightly towards him and hesitantly opened his mouth. 

Before he could say anything (leave) Tyki sat up quickly, deciding to start a fire and cook the fish that he had caught. He whistled as he worked, feeling the boy's eyes following his movements.

As he took one right off the fire, blowing lightly to cool it and disburse the smoke before he bit down, the boy finally made a sound, "You're not going to de-bone it?"

"Nope," Tyki chirped around a mouth-full of fish, flashing the boy a smile, "Takes too long."

The boy's nose wrinkled as he muttered, "Barbarian."

"Don't judge," Tyki scoffed good naturedly, "And I prefer heathen thank you very much."

The boy snorted, his lips quirking into something that was probably a smile but still seemed a bit sad. They sat in silence for a bit, Tyki eating and the boy trying to be subtle about his sneaked glances at the rest of the fish.

Tyki finally decided to put him out of his misery, waving a hand with relish at the rest of his catch, "You can have it boy."

The boy shot him a sharp glare, silver eyes narrowing, "I don't want it."

"Eat."

The boy sniffed, "Not hungry."

The sound of the boy's stomach growling echoed in the small space, the boy's face heating. Tyki smiled crookedly, laughing, "Not hungry. Right."

Tyki laid back on the cool grass, hands behind his head, as he closed his eyes, "Just eat it."

Tyki couldn't help but smile softly when he heard shuffling, opening one golden eye a sliver to watch as the boy slowly took one of the fish. Tyki couldn't help but laugh softly again when, after one hesitant bite, the boy started devouring not just that fish but the rest of them as well.

"Shut it." the boy shot at him, mouth still full of fish. Tyki mimed zipping his lips closed, earning him a light smack from the boy and a mumbled, "Child."

"Says the infant," he taunted.

The boy glared at him, though his posture had lost its earlier tension, softening the usually harsh silver stare. Tyki couldn't help but feel oddly proud as any tension left in the boy's body seemed to pop and deflate.

"Whatever you say, mole-face."

Tyki smirked at the white haired boy, "So you've been looking at me closely enough to notice it."

Once more Tyki felt it a personal victory when the boy turned red and started sputtering at him. (this was really turning into a day of indulgences)

"It's right there! Point and center! Practically takes up your whole damn ugly mug!"

"Point and center? Get lost a lot with that sense of direction?" Tyki goaded.

The boy pouted, "No!" his brow furrowed, "Maybe."

Tyki laughed once more, something definitely warm settling somewhere in his gut without his permission, but he finally stopped trying to fight it. He acknowledged that this must be what happiness felt like and that it was addicting once he let himself actually feel it.

The boy laid down next to him with a sigh, his arm coming up to cover his eyes, "I really do get lost a lot."

Tyki bit his lip as he turned (forced) his eyes away from the boy, wondering if he really wanted to break what had been a pleasant evening. Then again, he never had been one for things like subtly or tact or self control. (and he always seemed to make a mess of pleasant)(it might be one of those things that's just in his blood)

"Is that why you're here? You got lost?"

The boy paused. "Something like that," he finally gave, his words screaming that there was definitely more to it then that.

Tyki nudged the boy with his foot, "Something like that?"

The boy slowly lifted his arm from across his eyes, turning slightly towards Tyki. He could see the war being fought in the boy's mind, his silver eyes showing the battle. Tyki waited, not even able to lie to himself that he wasn't taking the pause to admire the soft features underneath the bruises and cuts and grime. There was a burning sensation within him that seemed to grow stronger and stronger the more time he spent with the boy. An emptiness that he just couldn't seem to fill enough no matter how long he looked. And yet he felt relaxed in the boy's presence, the burning and hole in his center somehow grounding. 

And, he realized with a start, that he hadn't felt the need for a cigarette today since the boy had appeared. (hadn't thought about it at all the last few times they had run into each other now that he thought about it) And he knew something about that fact should worry him, but in the moment--with the boy breathing quietly next to him, close enough that he could feel his warmth--he couldn't seem to care. (he had the bad feeling that he was simply replacing one addiction with another)(or maybe he was simply compounding)

(he really was so, so stupid)

Tyki was watching the boy so intently, that he noticed immediately when something in the boy shifted once more, when whatever battle he had been raging inside himself was over and done with. His silver eyes were resolute as they stared into gold.

"I may have been getting chased again before losing my way," the boy lowered his eyes, troubling his bottom lip. Tyki watched a gloved hand clench before silver eyes lifted to his once more, anger burning in their depths, "My master dumped me off a bit from here to repay one of his debts. But there's nowhere in this small town that I can earn the money his collectors needed so of course, of course they came after me!"

Tyki watched as the boy told his tale, as he then went on to rant more about his master, his hand waving wildly in the air as if directing his tale of irritation, of irresponsibility, of woe. (but even then he could hear that there was a deep buried fondness there as well)

Tyki listened until the boy tired himself out with his rant. He seemed to glow in his passion, his fury; he wasn't surprised that it took something out of the boy to burn that much. Tyki could only watch as the boy fizzled out. As his breathes evened out and his eyes slid closed.

Tyki allowed himself one more fix of the boy before he decided that today needed to be nothing more then a dream for the both of them. He couldn't get his hopes up and think that this could happen again.

Tyki forced himself to stand, to draw a quick map directing the boy back to the town, and leave. He wanted to stay, wanted to carry the boy back himself. But he knew better. (or he had to pretend he did)

(this wasn't an addiction he could afford to feed)

***

Mission: Kill to Send a Message  
China

Tyki (16)  
Allen (14)

Tyki stood over the women's body before him, feeling cold cold cold. Her still heart rested at his feet, his hand covered with her blood where it lay limp at his side. Otherwise, the only other evidence of what he'd done was the small stream of drying blood escaping the corner of her mouth and the deathly pale pallor of her skin.

She had been beautiful: pale skin, dark hair and dark eyes. She had smiled so prettily when she had first seen him, her lashes fluttering just a tad bit too much to be sultry like she was probably aiming for. But he had let her think that he was drawn into her web anyway. Had flashed her a smile in return and watched her all but melt.

She had been innocent: she was young and had been simply playing the part. Of courtesan. Of an assassin's lover. Of an Order member.

And for that, she had been ordered to die.

Tyki had known that he was not a good person. That the Noah, his family, were not good people. He killed and killed and killed and felt no remorse. But as he stared down at the lifeless women at his feet, he was afraid that he wasn't just not good but a monster. The thought scared him. The sticky blood on his hand felt damning.

He was so out of it, he didn't even hear the footsteps approaching. It wasn't until he heard a gasp behind him that he realized that he was not alone anymore with his guilt and the ghost of an innocent women. He slowly lifted his head, every movement felt like he was wading through molasses, and locked onto familiar wide silver eyes.

Of course, some part of his mind supplied, of course the boy would be the one to find him like this.

The boy's eyes jumped from the body to the blood on his hand to the heart on the floor. Knowing, damning, judging.

But he couldn’t help but feel that perhaps he deserved to be judged for this one.

"What have you done," the boy whispered, something empty and haunted entering his eyes, "Why… why would you kill Anita?"

"I got the order." he breathed out, the only answer he could give. It was the truth but yet it still felt lacking, "I… was given the order."

"So you just killed an innocent women because you were ordered to?" the boy snarled out, his emptiness turning into anger, "She… she wasn't a part of this!" the boy's voice rose to a yell, his fingers clenching into fists at his side.

Tyki felt nauseous. He shook his head in a daze, "I was only told that she was an associate, meant to be a message to someone, and her name."

He watched the boy try and rein in his anger, saw him clench his teeth. He opened his mouth to spit out more venom, when both of them heard footsteps down below.

The boy's anger dropped, the empty mask falling into place, "Go." he muttered, a thin thread of venom still left in his words, "My Master will be in here any second now. Get out."

Tyki wasn't sure if his limbs had the energy to move. But yet one moment he was watching the boy, the next he was by the boat where some of his family were waiting. He didn't remember willing his body to move. He didn't remember throwing up. But yet, he came to crouched next to the water with a sour taste in his mouth. He didn't react when warm arms wrapped around his neck.

"It's okay Tyki," Rhode whispered as she clung to his back, "It's okay."

He wasn't sure if it would ever be okay. But, he guessed, as the sound of the water roared around him, that was just how things were for people like them.(there was no escaping becoming a monster)

It felt freeing in its own twisted way. (it felt like damnation)


	3. Chapter 3

Mission: Clean Up  
England

Tyki (17)  
Allen (15)

Damn rain, Tyki cursed, as he ran for the nearest cover. He entered the nearest London coffee shop, cursing his luck, the stars and the heavens for his shit day that seemed to keep getting worse. The warmth of the shop was welcome, but he looked down at where his clothes were trying to suffocate him with distain. Damn wet clothes.

"Can I help you sir?"

Tyki looked up at the brunette before him, wishing that he could just be left alone in his misery. But he gave her his charming smile, the one that he had come to learn could get him almost anything he wanted, "Sorry I'm such a mess, can I wait out the rain in here?"

Her cheeks flushed and she gave him a nervous smile, "Oh course! Sit anywhere you like. Anything to drink?"

"Thanks love," he drawled, "A coffee would be great."

As she scampered off to get his order, he took a moment from stewing in feeling like a drowned rat to glance around the shop. 

Tyki couldn’t help the rueful chuckle that escaped him as he saw a familiar head of white hair. Of course he would run into the boy when his day was going horribly. He should have expected it, really. (stupid fate and her shitty shitty humor)

He should ignore the boy. Should leave and go back out into the rain. But, like usual when the boy was involved, his body moved without thinking towards the maybe Exorcist.

At his approach the boy lifted his head from where he had been staring at his drink, his silver eyes empty and lost. Dark bruises outlined his eyes and he appeared more drawn out and gaunt then Tyki had ever seen him before. He wondered idly when the last time the boy had slept and eaten a proper meal was. He looked as miserable as Tyki felt. 

Tyki didn't think before he collapsed into the seat across from the boy, those silver eyes following his every move. He figured they could commiserate about their shitty day (life). Didn’t they say that misery loved company? (that's what he would keep telling himself at least) (it wasn't because he had wanted to see the boy or anything) (that would be stupid of him)

The space between them was thick with memories of the last time they had met. Tyki cleared his throat and offered a hesitant smile, "You have a shitty day too?"

The boy simply looked at him before sighing and giving him a glum smile, "You could say that."

Tyki suddenly felt like he could breathe again. He didn’t want to think about how it settled something in the pit of his stomach that the boy was still speaking with him. Didn't want to think about the easiness that seemed to come over him when he was in the boy's presence. (that this was probably as close as he got to happiness)

Monsters like Tyki didn't deserve beautiful, fragile things like the boy before him. (but he was awful enough to want him anyway)

"So boy," he drawled to distract himself from what was starting to become another need, "Want to talk about it?"

The boy looked back down at his drink, his fingers clenching around the mug, "My Master up and disappeared on me in India leaving nothing but a note saying to go to the Order. And debt. Lots of debt."

Tyki's eyebrows rose in surprise, "Should you really be telling me this?"

The boy shot him a glare, "I don't really care. And you asked so."

Tyki chuckled, smiling at the waitress as she set his drink in from of him with a flustered flush before scurrying off once more, "Point taken."

They sat in silence for a bit after that, Tyki drinking his coffee and the boy staring at his own. It was nice, Tyki decided as the coffee warmed him up and improved his awful mood slightly. He didn't often get to enjoy the quiet; his family was loud and obnoxious during any off time and when he was handling an assignment every moment he had to be listening, observing, acting. There were no restful moments except for the brief period of time directly after a kill, but that was a different kind of quiet then this. This felt almost… warm.

"And you?"

Tyki started at the boy's whisper, lost in the peace and quiet of the moment, "What?"

Silver eyes lifted to gold, "What's made your day so shitty?"

That damn warmth flooded him again, "ah," he started, trying to compose his thoughts that had suddenly seemed to scatter, "Mainly the rain. But I also got a shitty clean up assignment. Its completely Sheryl punishing me again for some imagined slight against Rhode."

The boy stared at him, his head slightly tilted to the side, "I see."

Tyki simply shrugged, tapping a long finger against his mug. They sat in comfortable silence again, both lost in their thoughts.

"So. You're joining the Order." He hadn't meant to say that. And he surely hadn't meant to say that with so much dejection and finality.

Something sad crossed the boy's expression as he stared at Tyki. It felt like a black hole had opened in his gut.

The boy dropped his gaze back to his mug, "I guess that'll officially make us enemies, huh?"

Tyki chuckled darkly, drowning the last of his coffee, "I guess so."

That hole in his gut seemed to be growing and growing and growing. It felt like it was trying to devour him whole. He stood, hands shaking and heart thudding as he threw some cash on the table. He had to leave. Had to get out right now.

Tyki didn't, couldn’t, look back at the boy as he made his way out of the coffee shop but he felt those silver eyes burning into his back all the same. He walked through the storm darkened day, wondering if this was simply the world giving him what he deserved for the sins he'd committed.

He wasn't sure why he felt so distressed. It really wasn't a surprise that he and the boy would end up on opposite sides. He'd known from the first moment he'd met the boy that this was how it'd end. The boy was fragile and beautiful and good and he was going to end up killing him.

What a shitty day. (life)  
It was still raining.

***

Mission: Kill the Ace  
America

Tyki (18)  
Allen (16)

Tyki loosened his tie as he snuck out the back of the casino, "Target's position?" he muttered into his earpiece.

"Close," Rhode answered, something sharp in her words. 

Tyki ran his hand through his hair as he leaned against the cool bricks, trying to remember what he'd done to piss off Rhode this time. He had honestly thought he had been a perfect gentlemen to her lately.

"Close. Would you like to define "close"" he tried, not really confident that he was going to get a response from an irate Rhode.

"Oh," Rhode's voice turned sickly sweet, a habit she had picked up from the Earl and which hadn't seemed to fade, "And now you want your sweet niece's help? I thought you said that you didn't need help."

And of course she had taken that little comment to heart. Right. He hadn't needed any help with the casino case. A target like this was an easy in and out when he didn't stop to indulge afterwards. (which may or may not happen frequently)(what could he say, a little gambling spiced things up for him) But an unknown enemy, an unknown distance away was beyond even his skills.

He was just thinking of the best way to kiss up to Rhode, when Tyki heard the distinct sound of a gunshot.

"Never mind, I think I found my target," He grinned, releasing one of his tease to locate where the gunshot had come from.

"Tyki!"

"I'm fine Rhode, I'll be off," he reassured as he made his way out of the back alley of the casino, bleeding into the busy crowd (that hadn't even paused at the sound of the gunshot) as he followed the black butterfly wings of his tease. He smirked to himself as people seemed to shift out of his way, unconsciously avoiding the predator among them. He drifted along with masses of people without being touched or paused. (a dance of push and pull)

Though there was no greenery in sight as he made his way through the city, no advert beauty, he couldn't deny that it still had its charm: blinding colors of dresses as women fluttered here and there, jewels on throats and fingers that glittered like stars, the smell of perfume trying to cover the stench of human stink, the faint smoke that always seemed to linger from cigarettes and powder and just plan dirt. It seemed disgusting, but there was this gritty beauty to it all. (he was starting to appreciate these things more at his old age of eighteen)

"Tyki Wait!" And Tyki couldn’t help but pause his weaving through the busy crowd, his musings brought to a halt; if it was anyone other then Rhode, he would have called that sharp pitch to her words worry.

He sighed, "What Rhode?"

She was quiet for awhile, but when she spoke again her voice was steady with only a faint hint of what might have been worry left, "Be careful. I just got a report that whoever you're going towards just killed a rank two Akuma."

Tyki was reminded once more that though Rhode acted young and childish, she was one of the oldest Noah. His throat felt tight and he had to close his eyes for a moment to steady himself. He was always dismissing Rhode, but he hadn't forgotten how she'd picked up his pieces and put him back together more than once. At the end of the day, no matter how much she annoyed him, she was his family.

"Got it Rhode," he whispered, "I promise I'll be careful." 

"Good." And the line clicked off.

Tyki continued through the city, knowing instinctively where his tease had gone. He stopped at the warehouse where his tease rested, its fluttering black wings almost blending in with the dark building. Tyki lifted his hand, the tease returning and melting back into his flesh without much thought, as he assessed the area. There weren't as many people here, just the usual scattered druggies or homeless that were slumped around. It seemed darker as well without all the lights and the crowds; only the faint setting sun gave any illumination.

Normally he would have waltzed right in, but Rhode's lingering warning was still in his head. Tyki climbed the warehouse with ease, deciding to get the higher ground on his target within. It was an easy feat for him to phase through the roof and onto the banisters just below. He crouched, eyes landing on the multiple low level assassins (Akuma) that littered the floor. It wasn't hard to spot his target even in the dim light; there was only one shadowed figure left standing.

Tyki readied his knife, and silently jumped. He landed lightly, reaching around his target in one smooth motion. He had meant to simply slit his enemy's throat but was surprised when his target didn't try to pull away from him but instead slammed his body back into him, causing both of them to fall. Tyki muttered a curse as he dodged the elbow that his target threw at him, his target's other hand holding the knife back from his throat with ease. 

A decidedly well placed elbow had him releasing his knife, his target taking no time to turn his won blade back on Tyki. Tyki rolled, kicking the smaller body off and away from his as he went. He reached for the second blade he always kept on him, standing from the dirty warehouse floor just in time to block the stolen blade that was aiming for his person.

Tyki bit back more curses as he danced with his target, only hissing when he felt the sharp blade cut into his side through his suit jacket. (and Sheryl was going to kill him for that one; this was the fifth suit he'd ruined this month)

He was frustrated. He never really had had any issue dealing with his targets. No one before had given him this much trouble. And yet, he couldn't help but think as he kept pace with his target's strikes, that he was also kind of enjoying himself. He felt his lips twisting into a grin. He felt his heart thudding in his chest. And he felt-- he felt alive. 

There had really only been one person that had ever given him trouble. One person that had made him feel this excitement, joy. Only one person who he--

Tyki stopped suddenly, gripping his target's wrists as he dragged him in close, "Boy?" 

His target froze, pausing long enough to confirm his suspicion. Tyki slowly released the wrists he held to hesitantly reach out and lower the Exorcist's hood. He couldn't help the stuttering breathe that escaped him at the sight of those silver eyes.

His lips started to turn up into a smile, until he remembered their last meeting almost a year ago now. Neither of them moved, both simply content to stand there and share the others air. As if speaking would ruin anything delicate and fragile left between them. As if words would make everything real that they didn't want to acknowledge. So they stared, silver and gold meeting and holding to not break this little bubble of a moment.

Both of them jumped slightly when Rhode's voice suddenly broke through the silence, "Tyki! What's going on? Did you get the Exorcist who killed that rank two Akuma?"

The boy was so close that he knew that he could hear Rhode's voice from his ear piece. He stared into those silver eyes as he replied evenly, "No, he got away." 

"Damn," he heard his niece huff, back to her usual mood ,"I'll send a door in five."

He really was getting good at lying to his family, he mused, as he stared into the boy's silver eyes. (It always fascinated him how silver could burn so much)

"Why," the boy whispered finally, his British accent absent and replaced with something purposely neutral.

Tyki didn't answer. He simply stared at the white hair, red mark and burning silver eyes. At the snug dark blue coat with real silver tarnishes. He wondered how many years it had been now since he'd first met the boy. Wondered how someone could start to grow out of boyhood and yet get prettier. (he didn't really have an answer for the boy, it was a mystery to him as well)

"Tyki." the boy demanded, his British accent back as he said the new name.

And oh, Tyki liked the sound of his name on those lips. Liked it too much. And the warmth radiating from the body close to his was intoxicating. And… He really needed to stop while he was still pretending to be ahead.

"Hmm?" he questioned elegantly, all his efforts being put into not touching the boy.

"I asked why." the boy huffed, his frustration evident even as his accent disappeared once more. (he wondered idly when he'd started to grow out of it) The boy took a step away from him, "You- you lied to them. About me."

"For you." Tyki couldn't help but whisper because he was an idiot.

"Yes but why!" the boy growled, his silver eyes flashing, stepping once more into his space, "I'm an Exorcist. You're a Noah. Why would you help me after I killed one of your underlings?"

Tyki couldn't control his hand as it brushed against a heated pale cheek. He leaned in close, his lips brushing the boy's ear, "Because I am oh so selfish my lovely cheating boy."

And oh if only he had a shred of sense in him. But then, he supposed, he would never be this close to the lovely boy. (And wouldn't that just be a shame?)

With the last of his self control he parted from the boy, thankful that Rhode chose that moment to send her door. He opened the heart-shaped checkered door, his weak self looking back at where the boy was still frozen in what looked like disbelief. He smirked and stepped through the door, the sound of the door closing behind him feeling comforting for once. (He felt like he was running away from his own stupidity)

Tyki really had to wonder when he would stop flirting with death.

***

Mission: Kill the Traitor  
Romania

Tyki (18 1/2)  
Allen (16 1/2)

Tyki told himself that he wasn't going to interfere. The boy could handle himself, he knew that. He should just keep walking. He should not help the boy out against some of his own underlings, akuma. He should-- (but he'd never been very good at doing what he should)

He found himself lingering, watching the fight before him unfold. The boy made fighting seem beautiful, he thought, and then chided himself right after. The boy was deadly, he'd more then proven by this point that he was a threat. But Tyki couldn't help but think that something was off about the boy's movements today. Yes, he was still keeping up, but he seemed… off. A few seconds slower. 

Tyki cursed when he realized that he saw no red mark. The moon hit the boy just right and the white bandage over his eye seemed to glow. Tyki didn't think when he saw the strike coming for the boy from his bad side. He didn't pause as he smoothly broke the akuma's arm--her howl echoing--and stabbed her in the kidney. He let the body of his family's underling drop, sparing no pity or remorse for the pain that flashed across her face or the blood that slowly started to pool around her.

"Lord Noah," she croaked out, "Why?"

Mimi. That had been her name. Lulubell's maid. She'd been obsessed with the women. And with keeping the manor clean. He remembered the dirty looks she used to shoot him when he would track in messes. She had been annoying, but harmless. Devout to a fault.

Tyki turned away from her without answering, his gaze falling onto a widened silver eye. (he didn't himself know why) (and he'd be damned if that wasn't becoming a theme lately)

The boy took a step away from him, his hand reaching up to claw the bandage covering his eye. He seemed more skittish then normal, his shoulders hunched in just so. 

"Tyki," the boy whispered, "Why would you… What do you want with me?"

Tyki sighed, running his hand through his curls. Now wasn't that the biggest question. But, no. He might not know why, but he knew what he wanted. He knew…

But it could never be his.

So he just sighed again, looking helplessly at the white haired boy before him, and gave him the only answer he could, "I don't know."

That seemed to trouble the boy; he frowned slightly before letting a smile fall across his face (a defense mechanism, he concluded). It was too wide, too forced, too empty while appearing so damn happy --a Joker's smile.

"You saved my life and want nothing for it?" the boy chuckled humorlessly, "Come on, Noah, we both know that that's not how this works."

Tyki looked away from that damning smile, his eyes falling on the bloodied blade that he still clutched in his hand. He had spilt an akuma's blood. His family's blood. Something nauseous swept through him at the thought.

She had almost looked cute as she'd smiled up at Lulubell. Usually sour, something within her seemed to glow when she looked at the women. He remembered thinking that this must be what love looks like.

"Just go, boy," he choked out, needing to be alone with the sin he had just committed all for the boy that stood before him. (with all the sins that he kept committing, that just kept piling up higher and higher and higher)(he wondered when he would simply collapse under their weight)

He could almost hear the boy pause, held in place by words that he still wanted to say. Eventually Tyki heard the distinct soft footsteps of him leaving. And he was hurting and cursing himself but he was just so damn weak that he couldn't help but look up and watch the boy's retreating back. (he realized that somewhere along the line, the boy had grown up--he wasn't really a boy anymore)

As if feeling Tyki's eyes on him, the boy turned back around to look at him, his Joker's smile wiped from his face. Tyki felt a pain in his chest; he didn't know, couldn't understand, the look that the boy was giving him now.

Burning or smiling or empty. That'd been how he'd come to narrow the boy's defaults to. But this look was different. Softer then empty, but with less heat then burning. There was no sign of the black hole that the boy sometime became, either. If anything, it was a more thoughtful expression then anything else. (he didn't know what to make of it and that scared him)

"My name." the boy finally whispered, "I can give you my name in return."

"It's Al-"

Tyki hadn't realized that he had been moving closer to the boy until he stood right before him. He cut him off with a hand over his mouth, the warmth against his palm almost too distracting, scolding, damning. (he was suddenly immensely happy that he had started to wear gloves lately) Some part of Tyki knew that he should withdraw his hand, that this (whatever the hell this was) was dangerous. That this boy was dangerous. But yet, he couldn't seem to move.

After a beat too long of them just staring at each other, of them standing too close and too warm, Tyki whispered, "It's better I don't know, eh boy?"

(Because then they could keep playing this game a little longer)


	4. Chapter 4

Mission: Kill the Stalker  
Japan

Tyki (19)  
Allen (17)

The boy seemed happier the next time he sees him. (he was really starting to feel like a stalker)

He wasn't doing anything special, simply walking with his friends--his fellow Exorcists. He was smiling and seemed more settled then Tyki had seen him before. And he shone. Oh, did he shine. 

Tyki had never realized how bright the boy was. Yes he had admired the boy's beauty, but he had never noticed the way the world around the boy seemed just that much brighter. There was also a light in the boys eyes that had been absent before. Wherever the boy's path was taking him, it seemed to be slowly chasing out that darkness that he had once seen in those silver eyes.

And Tyki would rather die then admit to simply sitting by and watching the boy shine brightly, brilliantly, damningly. But yet he couldn't look away. But yet--

(he couldn't help but think that something that shone that brightly had to burn out quickly)

...

Mission Meeting  
Headquarters

Tyki (19)

It was odd for the whole family to be gathered like this. They each had such strong personalities that there usually was only room for a few of them in a single room at a time. But for all of them to gather in one room, at one table, for an actual meal was asking for trouble. Or for the room to explode into fire and chaos.

And it probably would have already burst into mayhem, Tyki supposed as he fought the urge to mess with his too tight tie, if the Earl wasn't sitting at the head of the table smiling. 

Everyone behaved themselves through the first two courses. The twins managed to contain their energy to small hits and kicks under the table, Lulubell kept her disapproval to silent glares and Sheryl only smacked him once under the table to remind him not to slouch.

It was all going so smoothly that it almost, almost, surprised him when things went sour by the third course when Skinn got mad at something on his plate for not being sweet enough and chucked it across the table where it hit the twins, Debitto and Jasdero. 

After that, everything exploded. The twins were stomping across the table, guns waving in the air. Skinn started tossing more not-sweet-enough things around the room. Sheryl was fake sobbing because some unknown particle of food had ruined his hair. A cup had hit Wisely in the head and he was now rolling dramatically on the floor. And Lulubell was screeching at everyone to sit back down and act like mature adults.

It was in moments like these that he realized how crazy his family truly was. It figured that even with the Earl present, things could only stay civil for so long. (even the fear of death couldn't control his family's stupidity)

Tyki lounged back in his chair, smirking as he watched his family's antics unfold. He was surprised that the Earl was still simply chatting away with Rhode, but he wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth. There was nothing like a good family scuffle to alleviate one's boredom. In the spirit of things, Tyki even tossed some of his food at the twins and dumped the rest of it down the back of Sheryl's expensive suit jacket. (and he was only a bit proud of himself when Sheryl started sobbing for real)

And then everything went silent as a piece of cake hit Rhode in the face. 

He hadn't seen who had done it, but that didn't matter. Rhode didn't care about collateral damage when she went berserk. Tyki was out of his chair and halfway towards the nearest window before anyone could blink.

"Enough."

Tyki froze where he was, one leg already thrown out the window. Every instinct told Tyki that it was time to go, that Rhode was seconds from going off and she was crazy, but he still was unable to disobey the Earl. So he compromised. He paused his escape, but he stayed where he was: perched so he was straddling the sill, hands clenching the window to throw the rest of his body out if (when) needed. 

"Enough." the Earl said once more, in a quiet voice, "It's time to get to business."

Nobody moved, all of his family with a hesitant eye on Rhode who stood, shaking, with her hands clenched at her sides. Her hair and bits of cake were covering her expression, but Tyki didn't really have to guess at her mood. She was murderous. He honestly was surprised that she was holding it together this well, even with the Earl's intervention. (he would have thought that she would have just killed them all and then smiled cutely back up at the Earl with their blood covering her with an oops)

Everyone in the room seemed to hold their breathe as Rhode sat down roughly in her seat, "Go ahead, my lord," she gritted out between clenched teeth.

The Earl nodded at the oldest Noah and continued, "We’ve been skirting around the Exorcists for too long now. It's time that the game starts for real."

"And how do you say we go about that?" Tyki asked hesitantly as he slowly made his way back through the window and towards the table.

The Earl's eyes landed on him, so dark they appeared black. His grin stretched wide across his scruffy face, "Why, my dear Tyki, by going after the real players. We've been doing our own thing, maybe getting rid of a pawn or two of theirs along the way, but it is not enough."

Everyone around the table nodded, sharp smiles seemed to cut across the face of most. Even Rhode unclenched her teeth to flash a smile that was all teeth. Tyki simply nodded his agreement, his spine locked as the Earl's gaze never wavered from him.

"And you, Tyki Mikk, are going to be the first to strike."

Tyki felt sick. He thought of a certain white haired Exorcist. Of silver eyes that seemed to burn.

He smiled too wide and, for the first time, it felt forced, "Of course, my lord. Where do I begin?" 

...

Mission: Start the Game  
Belgium

Tyki (19)

It almost made it worse, what he had to do, that Belgium was beautiful in the setting light. A picturesque little town, bordered by water on one side and lush rolling hills and valleys with some rocky prominences on the other. It looked like a fairytale. And he was here to disturb this peace. (he guessed that probably made him the villain)

Tyki walked among the cobbled streets, top hat pulled down to cover his eyes. He stalked through the town, listening, observing. His intel said that the Order General was somewhere close, but it came down to listening in on town gossip to figure out that this strange old man liked to take his tea in the forest just down the way.

He guessed that he should be happy as he veered from the happy little town to find this forest, but even the foliage that he came to seemed too pretty to disturb. It was with a heavy heart that he weaved among the trees, searching for his target.

It didn't take long to find the General. He sat in a little clearing, sipping tea as he stared off into the distance. Tyki felt sick again; he didn't look strong and fearsome. No, he looked like someone's kind, old grandpa.

Tyki closed his eyes and let out a shuttering breathe, wishing that he could pause his bloody task to take a smoke. But he knew that he couldn't let himself stop to pause, to think. So he didn't give himself time to stew farther. He drew his knife and attacked.

Tyki was surprised when the old man turned towards him before he could strike, dodging his attack easily. But he recovered fast, striking once more successfully across the old man's chest. The General spared a glance down at his lightly bleeding chest before lunging into motion once more.

They fought back and forth until the General got in a strike that sent Tyki flying into one of the many trees surrounding them. (the feeling of air being knocked out of his lungs was really starting to get old) Tyki grinned as he wiped a drop of blood from the side of his mouth. His grin only grew impossibly wider when Tyki felt the chains that General Yeegar was known for wrap around his arms. He was trapped, snug against the rough bark with the cold metal chains wrapping tighter and tighter around his arms and moving on to wrap around his chest.

Tyki watched the General walk towards him slowly, his expression solemn. He didn't look so much like a kind old grandpa anymore. (and some part of him was thankful for that)(it made what he had to do easier)

"Noah," the man finally spoke, the simple word sounding like a curse, "What business do you have with me?"

"The Millennium Earl just wanted to let you Exorcists know," Tyki started, his voice dripping with a contempt that seemed ingrained in his blood, "that the show is about to begin."

"Show?" the General's wrinkled brow scrunched up.

"The show," Tyki chirped, his grin widening, widening, widening, "the show~ the hunt for the heart~"

General Yeegar's face darkened, his eyes blazing with a fire that Tyki wouldn't have thought the old man capable of. "You'll never find it," the old man growled.

And that told Tyki all he needed to know. He sighed, his expression becoming bored, "Damn, so that means that you don't have it."

"Tell me!" the man ordered, his chains tightening farther, "Tell me what the Earl knows of the heart!"

Tyki smirked, phasing easily through the tree behind him. He dragged the chains that were still wrapped around him with him through the tree, forcing the General right into the sturdy trunk. He slipped down the barked surface as he was knocked out, his chains loosening their hold.

Tyki undid the chains around him, brushing off his clothes with distain. He pinched the metal links between his fingers, a savage grin filling his face as he stared at the chains. He strolled to the General who was still knocked out, getting a sick sort of enjoyment as he strung the old man up with his own weapon.

The General stirred just as Tyki was finishing up, brushing his gloved hands together. He lifted his head slowly, his eyes unfocused for a bit. They seemed to clear when they locked on Tyki, darkening with a hatred that was older then either of them. (this war had been going on and on and on so long that sometimes it all felt pointless) The old man rattled his chains, cursing as he realized that he was hung up by his own weapon.

Tyki strolled towards the General, watching as a Tease lightly landed on his lifted fingers with a small smile. "So General," he began, reaching out with his other hand to gently stroke the black wings of his Tease, "You've already so kindly told me that you don't have the heart. Mind telling me where it is?"

The General spat at him, "Never Noah."

Tyki grinned, "I was hoping you'd say that."

"Time to eat~" he sang as he phased the Tease on his fingers inside of the old man, calling more to him as he did.

…

"The Millenium Earl… is searching~" the old man croaked out in a twisted melody, his battered body hanging limply from his own chains, "searching for the precious heart~"

Tyki wanted to be proud of what he had done, what he turned the high and mighty general into. He had enjoyed the task somewhat, as awful as that made him. He hadn't minded the man's screams, the curses, the tears. The blood. (he had already passed the point of no return awhile ago)(he was a monster, after all)

But watching the old man now, staring vacantly down at the blood soaked ground while singing the harrowing tone, didn't make Tyki feel anything like happy or proud. It made him feel sick.

~I wasn't the one he sought~

Tyki turned away from the proud man that he had broken, running both his hands through his hair and tugging. He squeezed his eyes shut, knowing that even now he wasn't done. (never done)

~who will it be~

Tyki drew his knife, turning back towards General Yeegar one last time. He didn't think as he carved the words into the General's chest, couldn't feel the blood through his gloves. The old man laughed and laughed and laughed, still mumbling out in-between the tone that the Earl had instructed Tyki to send as a message to the Exorcists. God Hunt stood out vividly against the old man's pale chest, the words seeming to weep blood as more and more fell to the ground.

Tyki dropped his blade, turning and walking away as the dark tune seemed to follow him. 

~Millennium Earl is searching, searching for the heart~

Out of the forest. Out of Belgium. The tune followed, haunted. He wasn't sure where he collapsed, only that he felt the cool ground meet him as he curled in on himself. He clawed at his ears, gritting his teeth at the pain of finger nails digging into his own flesh. But still, that damn tune continued.

~I wasn't the one he sought, who will it be~

(what had he done)(what had he done)(what had he done)


	5. Chapter 5

Mission Respite  
Headquarters

Tyki (19)

He couldn't eat for a few days after. Everything tasted like copper and ash and death in his mouth.

He couldn't sleep for weeks. Every time he tried, he'd hear that damn melody. See the pitiful old man hanging there limply.

He'd been living off cigarettes, alcohol and self loathing alone since what he had done to the General.

But he didn't want to worry his family so he tried to act like everything was fine, that he didn't feel pieces of himself dying inside. He smiled and laughed and bothered Rhode and Sheryl. He made fun of Wisely and the twins and steered clear of Skinn and Lulubell like usual.

But he must not have been doing a good enough job because Rhode cornered him in his room after only two weeks of his feeble attempts at appearing fine.

"Tyki," she started, her youthful face expressionless, "What's been up with you lately?"

Tyki forced a smile and shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Rhode's eyes narrowed, her face otherwise still expressionless, "Tyki."

He sighed, standing to walk over to his window. He opened it all the way, closing his eyes at the cool breeze. He drew and lit a cigarette from the pack he kept by his window, taking a drag to give himself time to think about what he was going to give Rhode. (because when she looked at someone like that, there always had to be something given)

"What is the "heart" anyway?" he finally asked, opening his golden eyes to watch his senior family member.

Rhode tilted her head to the side, her face still blank, "Odd question."

Tyki shrugged, looking away from her stare. (he felt oddly like prey being stared down by a predator, which made no sense)

He thought that that was all she was going to give so he startled slightly when she continued, "Nobody knows exactly, it's more myth then truth probably, but the Earl has always been obsessed with it."

"But what is it supposed to be then?"

Rhode shrugged, "About what you'd expect, some type of weapon" she smiled, it was a jagged line across her petite face, "Isn't it always about a weapon?"

Tyki shook his head, curious despite himself about what this whole thing was for, "I don't understand."

Rhode looked out the window, her expression distant, as she wrapped her boney arms around her thin frame. She looked sad, he realized, and the thought made him feel even more unsteady. (Rhode didn't do sad)(or at least, he didn’t think she did)

(he was realizing that maybe he didn't know his family as well as he thought)

"Dark matter, Innocence," Rhode whispered, still staring out the window, "It's all about trying to collect all the pieces of each. Whichever side does "wins"."

"Wins? Wins what? And what does the "heart" have to do with it all?" Tyki didn't realize how bitter and angry the words sounded until they were already out and impossible to take back.

Rhode didn't seem to care though, she just looked at him and gave him that small cruel smile again, "The heart is the easiest way to win against the Exorcists, supposedly. Whoever has their hands on it, controls every Innocence's power." She paused, "And it all comes down to winning the game."

Tyki scoffed, taking another draw of his cigarette, "Game this, game that. I still don't understand what it's all for."

Rhode caught his eye, her golden ones serious, "Survival. Revenge. Repentance. All of the above… Take your pick really."

He sighed, "Yea, still don't understand."

Rhode shrugged and sighed, "And hopefully you never do."

"Cryptic," he muttered.

Rhode gave him a teasing smirk, "Or maybe you're just stupid."

"Hey!"

She giggled, reaching out to ruffle his hair. "Oh," she started, reaching into her pocket and drawing out a playing card with a checkered back, "I have some more assignments for you."

Tyki took the card, a weight resettling on his chest as he read the names that were on it, "They're all Exorcists."

Rhode turned away from him, skipping back to the door, "Yup! The Earl is serious now about taking them out." She leaned against the doorframe and turned to look at him over her shoulder with a vicious smirk and shining golden eyes, "I suggest you start from the top."

And then she was gone.

Tyki gritted his teeth, cursing when he ruined his forgotten cigarette that had been resting in his mouth. He stared at the crumpled piece of paper, feeling as if something was being scooped out of his gut. More Exorcists to kill. More pointless murders. There would be no reward, no money, no happy customer. It was simply ten lives that he was supposed to take out to appease the Earl. For this pointless, endless war. (he really just wished that he knew why)

He thought about not doing it, about pretending that he didn't see the names written in sharp characters on the card. 

He sighed, knowing that he really had no choice in the matter. He was asked to do this by his family, for his family. And he didn't really mind killing. (it was all he had ever known) What were a few more deaths, a few more added sins? (he was already unredeemable anyway) 

He looked down and read the first name on the list, the card showing him a picture of his target.

Daisya Barry

It was time to kill some Exorcists.

...

Mission: Going Through the Kill List  
Turkey

Tyki (19 1/2)  
Allen (17 1/2)

Tyki didn't know how someone could smile that brightly and yet still look empty. (he couldn't help but wonder what could take the life out of you so completely)(but then again, he thinks he knows) 

It was eerie; a smile that bright with eyes that dark. Once more, Tyki realized that the boy really was more like him then he usually seemed. He too was a creature of darkness. Someone with the ability to become a monster. After all, you strip them both down and all you really get are murderers. (flip sides of the same damn coin)

Tyki couldn't help but think that he didn't really like this version of the white haired boy, though. That he had probably played a role in emptying the boy. That the loss of that light was a damn shame. 

"Boy," he drawled, "Fancy meeting you again."

That damned smile stayed in place. His words were clipped and polite with his accent long buried, "Wish I could say the same to you."

Tyki smirked to hide the want to frown, "So proper and nice. I thought I remembered you with more fire."

The boy's smile fell, but what was left was simply a vacuum, "The Order trains their Exorcists thoroughly in niceties. Because we are the justice in the dark. Saviors. For we only kill those who deserve." his words were flat. It seemed more like random phrases pushed together that had been spoken again and again by someone else.

Tyki had to control his urge to shudder, something about the complete lack of feeling in the words made him feel slightly off tilter. It was the first time that the boy had seemed so far removed from him. So like an Exorcist. He felt that even if he reached out right now, his fingers would pass right through the boy.

He couldn't stand it anymore, didn't want to think about it. He ruffled his slicked back hair until it fell around his face. He reached into his pants pocket and pulled out the deck of cards he always carried on him, even now.

"You play?" he didn't know why he was asking a question he already knew the answer to. He just didn't feel like fighting the boy tonight. Something in the air felt wrong. The whole night felt wrong. (the whole year) And playing poker seemed an anchor to another time and place. (he hadn't realized how easy it had been back then until it had gotten so much more complicated) 

The boy seemed to startle at his question, his fingers tightening into fists before relaxing, "Yes?"

Tyki smiled, forced and too bright, as he sat on the ground, "Well then, let's play a round or two." 

The boy watched him, a furrow between his brows, before his face smoothed over. The boy slowly took a step closer and sat across from him.

Tyki felt some tension within him snap, relief that he couldn't explain coursing through him. He hadn't lost the boy completely yet. (though perhaps he really deserved to)

They played a round, which turned into two, which turned into three, four, five.

Tyki found out that the boy really was a dirty cheat. He found out that even though the boy was a dirty cheat--and his smile was a tad bit evil-- he was fun to play with. That the easy back and forth between them that they once had maybe wasn't a dream. And, with each hand, he found that the wrongness of the night seemed to--not fade, but maybe not matter as much.

It was almost sad that a simple game of poker against his enemy was the most fun he'd had in a while.

...

Mission: Kill or Be Killed  
France

Tyki (20)  
Allen (18)

Tyki touched the tears that feel down his cheek, surprised. He had been told that something like this would happen when a fellow Noah died, but the thought of one of them dying had seemed so ludicrous (or at least, one of his family dying before him had seemed so unlikely) at the time that he had brushed off the phenomenon. 

He felt a tug towards the source of the connection. Tyki didn't want to go, but he found himself moving towards the woods anyway. The pull in his chest led him all the way to a clearing surrounded by charred trees. He wished he could say that he was surprised when he saw the white haired Exorcist standing over a dead Skinn Bolic, but he really wasn't. This just seemed to be how his luck was operating lately.

The boy didn't lift his head at Tyki's approach. His clawed hand lay limp at his side, small beads of blood falling from the pointed tips. Tyki stopped when he stood next to the boy, close enough that their shoulders brushed, and stared with him at the dead Noah's body. 

Tyki couldn't say that he was particularly upset about Skinn being dead. He hadn't particularly liked the sweet obsessed Noah, but there was something inherently discerning about seeing familiar dark skin and golden eyes bloodied and shredded and sightless and just so utterly gone. Dead. It felt too much like a foretelling of things to come; a reminder of the immortal Noah's mortality.

Tyki tore his eyes away from Skinn's lifeless body, looking instead at the boy next to him who still hadn't reacted to his presence. He seemed… dimmer then he had lately. Lacking his usual resolve. His shoulders were curled in on himself. And he was crying.

"Boy?" Tyki questioned, trying to mask any worry with careful nonchalance, "You really crying over killing your enemy?"

Finally, finally, the boy's eyes strayed from the body to meet Tyki's. He had never seen those silver eyes so troubled and unsure before but at least he was reacting now.

The boy reached out and gently touched his cheek, "You're crying too."

Tyki waved his hand and scoffed, trying to act like the fingers brushing against his cheek didn't feel like a brand, "Ignore it. Just a side effect of my blood." 

Tyki paused, unsure if he should continue or not. But, as often happened when the boy was involved, the words found their way out anyway.

"But, really, why are you crying boy?" he whispered, wishing he was brave enough to brush his fingers against the boy's scarred cheek.

The boy started to shake, his hands clenching at his sides, before a dam that Tyki hadn't even realized was in place broke, "They keep saying that we're on the side of justice, of God. They keep saying that we kill only the evil of the world so its okay. But I'm tired of it. I'm getting tired of all this pointless killing. I hate it."

Tyki chuckled darkly, "An assassin who hates killing is in the wrong line of business I'd say."

The boy's eyes burned into his, those damn tears still falling, "You enjoy it?"

Tyki could only shrug, helpless to voice how he'd been born with this power thrumming in his veins, with this taint. He'd never had a choice to become anything but what he was. But he was sure someone like the boy wouldn't understand that.

"I don’t dislike it," he gave, neatly excising half the truth.

"Then that makes us monsters!" the boy cried out, "And that makes us monsters who take lives for fun or profit while saying it's for the greater good."

"Boy," Tyki bit out, "There is no "for the greater good". There's only bad and badder and worst. And most days I think we all are part of the "worst". Your little Order thinks that they are so good, so much more righteous and better then us, and yet they are out here doing the same shit that we are. I'll tell it to you plain, boy. We. Are. All. Monsters." Tyki hadn't realized that some dam had broken inside him as well, but he couldn't keep back the words that had been burning and burning and burning within him for awhile now.

The boy seemed to deflate at his words as he crumbled to the ground. He wrapped his arms around his legs, his head buried between them so the only visible point was his white hair. Any anger he had burst as quickly as it had appeared.

"I just don't know what to do," he whispered, brokenly, "I don't want to be a savior who has to destroy."

Tyki collapsed next to the boy on a sigh. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it without answering. After taking a drag and blowing the smoke towards the dark, star filled heavens he couldn't help but give in to the urge to run his fingers through the boy's white hair. He gently stroked his way through the white locks, trying to comfort in the only way he could think of, wishing distantly that he wasn't wearing gloves. The boy tensed for a moment but eventually gave in and collapsed into Tyki's side.

Tyki didn't want to think about the warmth curled against him. How he was practically holding the boy. How right it all felt.

"We've been given shitty cards," he murmured into the night air to distract himself from his racing, damning, thoughts, "I don't know about your God, but sometimes I think fate has it out for us."

"So then what do we do," the boy breathed into his side.

And now wasn't that the real question here.

Tyki took another drag of his cigarette, wishing he knew how to answer, wishing he knew what to do. But he was as lost as the boy, it seemed. 

"I don’t know," he sighed, "I guess all we can do is believe that what we're doing is right."

"And if you don't believe?"

Tyki smiled ruefully, "Then you're really screwed."

(and he wasn't sure if he had believed in anything in a long long time)

They faded into silence, both content to simply stay this way. As the boy's breathing evened out, as purples and pinks started to light the sky, Tyki couldn't help but feel at peace. Everything was shitty, but this… this was okay. (he believed in this)

(he was so so royally screwed)

...

Mission Respite  
Headquarters

Tyki (20)

Allen Walker. 

Tyki supposed that it was ironic, funny almost, that he'd finally learned the boy's name this way. Fate truly had a shit sense of humor. 

He twirled the playing card in his hand, the checkered back giving way to that damning name along with the damning face that somewhere along the way he'd gotten to know. He supposed that he shouldn't be surprised. He was a Noah and the boy-no, Allen Walker was an Exorcist. This was bound to happen. (He was truly fated to kill the boy)

He grinned, laughter bubbling up from within his chest, as he clutched at his dark curls. He tugged until it hurt to distract himself from the pain in his chest.

(of course the game had to end sometime)


	6. Chapter 6

Mission: Kill Allen Walker  
Russia

Tyki (20)  
Allen (18)

"Allen Walker"

Allen whirled towards him, Sumon Dark still slung over his shoulder. His eyes widened in surprise. Words seemed to elude him, his mouth opening and closing uselessly, before he finally choked out , "How?"

Tyki threw the playing card at the boy's feet, "Your name came up Exorcist."

The boy stared at him, his face empty before a small sad smile crept across his features. He gently set his comrade against the nearest tree before turning to face Tyki fully.

"Can I know your full name now at least?" 

Tyki knew that he shouldn't, knew that there was no need, knew that it was stupid--"Tyki Mikk"

He could only watch as Allen's eyes closed briefly. When they opened, they were that familiar silver liquid fire. Tyki stared in something close to wonder as Allen called upon his power: a burst of light so bright and pure shining from the cross on his hand as it morphed into elegant claws. Tyki felt nearly blinded. Allen stared at him solemnly.

He guessed this time it really was serious if Allen was truly trying to kill him. (the boy was usually so soft)

There was no pause, no breathe, before they came clashing together. Every strike seemed to be edged with finality, a brutal count down towards the end of whatever this had become. There was an intent to kill that had been absent before. 

Once more, Tyki was impressed by his opponent's skill. Once more, his prey actually made the fight something entertaining. Once more, his target was good… but he was better.

A similar strike to neatly slot his knife between ribs. A similar counter that left them rolling and fighting and clawing at each other. A similar height difference that gave Tyki the advantage.

He pinned Allen beneath him, both of them breathing hard. Tyki didn't pause as he struck out and wrapped his hand around his opponent's rapidly beating heart. Around Allen Walker's heart. Tyki closed his eyes as he rested his forehead against the cool dirt, his nose buried in Allen's white hair where it surrounded his head like a halo, breathe harsh in the boy's ear.

"Tyki Mikk," the boy whispered. If anyone had asked if someone could say his name so softly, gently, delicately (lovingly) he would have laughed. And yet--

Tyki squeezed the heart in his grip tighter, a harsh chuckle tearing itself from his chest as he realized just how helpless he was. He just--couldn't do it. He had done so many unspeakable things, awful things, but this was the one thing that he just couldn’t do. (that he couldn’t survive doing)

He released the boy's heart, withdrawing his hand from within the boy's chest to simply rest against the dark fabric of his jacket.

"You're just a boy," he muttered, just as soft as the boy's earlier words but more twisted and ugly and raw. 

Gold eyes met silver, their bodies still too close, the warmth still too scorching.

"Can you really still say that all these years later?" the boy chuckled without humor, his eyes mournful.

Tyki moved, pushing himself back against the nearest tree. He just stared at where their legs were still tangled as he drew a cigarette from his pocket. He was almost proud of himself when his fingers didn't shake as they lit the end. He dragged his eyes away from their tangled limbs, lifting his face towards the starlit night sky to release a miserable puff of smoke. It really was cold, he thought. The night sky was beautiful, shining, but so so cold.

He didn't startle as he felt the odd weight of a clawed hand settling against his throat, "This can't go on," the boy murmured gently.

Tyki couldn't help but smile at the true sorrow in the Exorcist's words. It was always going to come down to one of them killing the other. It was just a shock to him that he was content in this ending. Killed by his enemy as they mourned his loss. And it didn't hurt that his executioner was truly a sight to behold. (like a demon being given the honor of death by an angel)

Tyki took another drag of his cigarette, blowing the breathe of polluted air towards that cold night sky full of blinding stars, as he smirked. He really was a selfish bastard.

"Well, boy, go ahead then." 

Tyki watched the boy's face shatter and fall apart -- not empty or full of fire or hidden behind a smile. No, the boy was crying with his anguish clear on his pretty face. Tyki felt something dark and warm bubble up inside him at the boy's suffering. There was no mask, no blinding light. For once, the boy seemed so utterly human. It was intoxicating. And it made it even sweeter to the Noah of Pleasure that it was all for him. (misery looked good on Allen Walker)

The boy let his hand fall from around his throat, sliding down to bunch in Tyki's dark dress coat instead. His white head fell against Tyki's chest as he seemed to deflate before his eyes.

"I can't do it Tyki Mikk."

A shiver ran down his spine. He wanted to bask in those words, in the boy's feelings. He wanted to grasp onto whatever this was and never let go; to hold Allen Walker at his side tight enough to suffocate, monopolize his thoughts so that he could only think of Tyki.

But it was just too late.

Those words were more damning then anything now.

Tyki had walked into this knowing that only one of them could leave. He had realized shortly after that it probably wouldn't be him. And he had come to terms with that. Accepted it. And yet, he should have known that the white haired boy in his arms would surprise him once more.

Tyki let his cigarette drop, his forehead falling to rest atop the boys bowed head. He couldn't help but laugh against the white strands, ignoring how close to a sob it sounded. He really was doomed, too self destructive to live. Otherwise this warmth, this damn sticky affection in his chest wouldn't exist. Especially when it was for something that he would never be able to keep. 

(they didn't get a happy ending)

Oh, if only Allen Walker had been crueler.

"Such a shame," he breathed into the boy's hair, his hand once more plunging into the boy's chest, "If only this didn't have to end with one of us dead."

He felt Allen's body tense, felt him struggle to push himself away. But Tyki held on, hating himself as he kept his grip on the Exorcist's heart. It really was such a shame, so tragic, how fragile a heart was, he couldn't help but think as he did nothing more then cause a small nick in Allen Walker's heart. 

He pulled his hand out, finally releasing his hold on the Exorcist. Blood coated his glove, but he felt nothing through the thick layer of material. Allen weakly pushed himself away, not getting far before he collapsed. His own heart was working against him now, each beat killing him faster as he bled out internally. His silver eyes locked onto Tyki's gold as he uselessly clutched at his spotless chest. (and oh did silver burn burn burn)

Tyki could see the accusation in those eyes, an emotion that bordered on hate. And Tyki felt like he was being ripped apart inside, as if he was the one with a hole in his heart, but all he could do was smile too wide as he stood before the dying Exorcist. He carefully reached out a shoed foot and rested it against the shining cross on the boy's hand. If he was going to damn himself, he thought, he might as well do it completely. 

And with barely a thought he crushed the innocence, the boy too far gone to even cry out in pain.

Tyki turned, needing to get away from what he'd done, as he reached into his pocket with a shaking hand for another cigarette. (everything was spinning and spinning and spinning and he really needed it to just stop) He felt like throwing up when he felt the familiar sharp edge of his pack of cards instead; the cards burning him, damning him, even through his glove. An anchor to another time and place, he had once thought. A piece of proof of how easy it could be between them.

He wrapped his hands around the deck, embracing the feeling of the cards digging into his gloved hand. Everything was over now. Any peace and quiet and easy they once had was long dead and gone and really really needed to be buried. They had been stealing moments for too long. This was their reality. (their ending) They were at war. They would always be at war. And they would always always be on opposite sides.

Tyki pulled the familiar deck out, knowing that he had to leave this last thread of good behind. It was nothing more then a flimsy, sweet dream that truly wasn't his to hold onto. Not anymore. Not after what he'd done. (monsters don't get good and dreams and easy; they devour them)

"Goodbye Allen Walker" Tyki whispered, no emotion left in his voice, as he scattered the cards to cover the Exorcist's broken body.

Time seemed to move oddly after that. Everything was a blur, nothing made sense. The hurt in his chest seemed to snap and a quiet silence settled in its place. For the first time, Tyki felt truly empty.

He didn't remember getting back to the other Noah. Couldn't remember Rhode wrapping him in her arms. 

He was unsure how long she had been trying to talk to him, but he finally came to with her babbling in his ear about how sorry she was and oh Tyki. 

He idly wondered how bad he must look because Rhode didn't say things like sorry and she was looking at him like she was breaking as well.

He also realized that her small frame was all that was keeping him standing, there was no strength left in his body. 

And yet, Tyki couldn't make any of it matter beyond registering as a buzz in the back of his mind. All he could think about was burning silver eyes, about a boy who shined so brightly it hurt… and a broken body covered by checkered cards.

And he hurt all over again.

(he had a feeling this was how life without Allen Walker was always going to be)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it for the first part of this story! I want to thank those of you who have gotten this far, I know this is a slow story. I do have more planned in my head but, unlike these chapters, it is not yet written out. I mainly wrote this for fun because I found a bit ago a lack of longer stories for these two and my brain got thinking so take that as you will.
> 
> Let me know what you liked, didn't like etc. It really helps me for future reference!


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